Hsv in the city is an inclusive herpes support group and blog in the DC metro area.

My Safer Sex Tool Kit

How I practice safer sex

When I originally set out to create this post, I was thinking about what I have in my safer sex kit and what is different when I think might be getting an outbreak. Sometimes during that “maybe, maybe not” time, my consenting adn HSV discordent partner and I would still like some sort of sexual intimacy. I made two separate lists and when I took a moment and looked at it. I realized the only think that was different is that when I feel like my body might be thinking about having an outbreak, we just don’t have P in V sex. We use gloved hands and separate toys, we still make out and snuggle. Sexual intimacy isn’t just penetrative sex, it can be whatever fulfills you. The most important thing is that you and your partner communicate and decide together what you both would like to do during that “maybe, maybe not” time.

Please remember that I am not a medical professional, and this is just what works for me and my partner in my own personal situation.

The below is my safer sex tool kit. This is what I make sure to have on hand and what works for me. Your tool kit may look very different than mine. I would love to hear about any other things you have in your tool kit in the comments or feel free to email me from the contact page.

My tool kit includes:

  • Communication with my partner and my body

  • Condoms- I really dig the Sustain brand

  • Valtrex – I personally choose to take this daily.

  • Dental dams

  • Lube- Again, I love that Sustain brand

  • Gloves

  • Sex toy for me- I big heart love the N’joy metal toys because they are smooth with no rough edges that might upset things down there.

  • A separate sex toy for them- This can work very well for same sex partners to have safer sex

The Instagram account @myboyfriendhasherpes does a wonderful job in explaining what they do in their HSV discordant relationship. I highly encourage you to check out that account in general since it’s pretty fantastic.

Disclosure Then and now

Why does HSV in the City exist, AKA how did I get brave enough to do this?